Easing the Teasing Strategies ("Easing the Teasing: How Parents Can Help Their Children" by Judy S. Freedman)

SELF-TALK

• Telling yourself, “I will not react with anger or hurt feelings.”
• Telling yourself, “I do not like teasing, but I can handle it.”
• Thinking about positive self qualities.

I-MESSAGE

• An effective way for children to assertively express their feelings to the teaser.
• An I-Message has three parts: it conveys how the child feels, what has caused the child to feel that way, and what the child would like the teaser to do.
• Example: I feel sad when you say that I am bad at soccer. I would like you to stop saying that.

VISUALIZATION

• Visualizing the words bouncing off of you.
• This provides children with a mental picture of not having to accept or believe what the teaser has said.
• Examples of mental images: I will play basketball and dribble the words away. When I ice skate, I will spin the tease away. I am an artist and I will erase the tease.

REFRAMING

• Reframing is taking and responding to the tease as if it is a positive statement rather than a put-down. Reframing is turning the tease into a compliment.
• Example: If a child is teased about her glasses and is called “four eyes,” the child can respond, “Thanks for noticing my glasses.”
• Example: If a child is teased about being short and is called “shrimp,” he could respond by saying, “I love shrimp.”

SO?

• The response of “So?” communicates to the teaser that the tease really does not matter.
• The child must say “So?” in an indifferent tone; not sarcastically.

IGNORING

• Proper body language is important so that the child does not react with sadness or anger.
• The child should walk away from the teaser with his or her head held high and with upright posture.